So I’ve been doing a lot more cooking for myself, and observing Aurora cook (she’s an awesome cook) and I’ve come to the realization that “holy shit, people in Texas like spicy food”. More on that later. Tonight however I’m back at home with power, and everyone else is out elsewhere (with power) so I figured I’d rustle up some grubs. As such I give you

Hurricane Ike Bachelor Mash

1 Can Cannelloni Beans more or less drained
1/4 Onion – Cut up in some approximation of “diced”
1 cup Jasmine Rice – Or Whatever’s in your pantry
2 Eggs* (You can go without these just fine for Vegi Mash)
A pinch of Cocoa Powder
A dark dabbling of Powdered Sugar
Veggi Spice (some weird Hindu Mix)
Cinnamon aplenty
Another various allspice
Pepper
Olive oil

Cook the rice in your rice cooker. While that’s going, drop your onions in the pan with the olive oil and get them a-cookin. Then once they’re going nicely, drop in the can of beans, and get mildly worried as splashes of hot oil pop and sizzle out of the pan. Let the excess sauce cook off as you season madly away. Make sure you get the beans sweet, or the thing will taste kind of weird, and it holds a peppery aftertaste well, so go nuts with that, and LOTS of cinnamon. Let it cook forever, as the rice finishes. Then get out a big thing of tupperware for the extras. Put your gruel in the tupperware, and spoon out a nice helping of rice into a bowl, and drop the gruel on top. If you want the non-vegi version, flash fry an egg. If you leave it without extra salt/pepper itll be sortof a mild proteiny addative who’se taste will be masked, so feel free to Emeril it up a notch and have a delectable explosion of flavors in your mouth.

Now you’re eating like a bachelor.